Click To Play

Transcript:

Hey there. I’m Johnny Ming. Welcome to TGR.

The first-land program allowed noobs to buy 512m of land for below market price. Unfortunately, the program catered to sleazy land barons out to flip the land for profit. Linden Labs has responded by discontinuing the program. Some fear that this will accelerate the number of homeless noobs.

However, analysts predict this will have no effect at all, since the only thing you can really build on 512m of land is...an outhouse.

This Saturday at Club Egret - guests were delighted with the music of celebrated jazz guitarist George Golla and the sultry sounds of acclaimed Australian singer Leonie Smith. The formal event was a smashing success for jazz lovers and cool cats alike!

Second Life has recently implemented a mandatory orientation for noobs.For those of you seeking spiritual solitude off the grid...on the grid- come join us at the newly opened monastery of Felix Meritis, masterfully created by Man Monett.

(Noob screams)

Here you can stop by the Italian Renaissance chapel for a virtual chat with god.

NOOB:
I feel as though there’s an unseen hand, like, controlling my every move.

SKYLA:
Dear virtual god - I’ve always wanted to know...(phone rings) would you excuse me please...I have to take that...

TRENT:
Stop me if you heard this one, Lord. A priest, a rabbi and a sheep walk into a bar... Or, for you homeless noobs with no equity - you can rent a one room cell for $200L a week where you can contemplate the true meaning of virtual earthly goods.

(Chanting)
Agnis deus amat. Agnis deus amat.

That's all for our show folks. See you next week on TGR.